Feb

24

The Best Things in Life are on a Stick

Filed Under Dished 

Two Fat Als Mallows

A tutorial on roasting marshmallows. Part of the Ladies who Lunch food reviews.

Lady N has always been a lover of the outdoors but has never got along with insects of any kind. (Blame it on the roach she dated years ago who always had problems finding his wallet when it came to paying for day-to-day expenses.) Since Lady N is not a believer in bug spray, or character reform for that matter, she had never stepped foot into a cottage, despite the invites she received growing up in the burb, and shunned the cicadas for the comforts of AC and the indoors instead.

Lady J, Lady N’s incredibly inspiring and worldly friend, was determined to show Lady N that cottage life was not about spiders or stingy suitors. It was about roasted marshmallows! Marshmallows that float down your throat like warm billowy clouds. Marshmallows that dissolve and collect into pools of sweet goodness in your cheeks the minute they hit your tongue. Marshmallows that stick to and delight the roof of your mouth in all its melted powdery-white marvel. Marshmallows that make you forget about the city and all the menacing boys that live in it.

Although Lady N was aware of Lady J’s many talents, Lady N had no idea how seasoned and skillful she was at roasting marshmallows. Lady J presented Lady N with a long even twig from its resting spot near the fireplace. Lady J brought two bags of marshmallows, one open, one not, and stationed herself in front of the fire that glowed hot embers and orange-coloured wood encrusted with burnt fibrous-looking gray bark. Lady J explained to Lady N that this low-burn was the exact temperature needed to roast a marshmallow to perfection and that any image Lady N may have of boy scouts with black-charred marshmallows surrounding sky-high campfire flames should be immediately discarded. That, Lady J said, is not the way its done. Lady N, knowing better than to challenge a friend armed with a twig, near an open fire, who can, at a moment’s notice, hold delicate marshmallows hostage, obediently agreed and watched Lady J roast away in total silence and awe.

Gingerly, Lady J, squeezed an old marshmallow down the tip of the large twig and let the marshmallow hover in the heat inches above the bright glow. Once the marshmallow started smoking, Lady J removed the twig from the fireplace and carefully cooled the marshmallow down while inspecting its golden colour. With one side browned, Lady J continued to roast the marshmallow in the exact same way, slowly rotating the marshmallow, until all sides were golden even. Satisfied with this clever man’s meringue (poor man’s meringue, if he’s buying) Lady J slowly pulled the brown skin apart from the marshmallow still stuck to the stick and decidedly put it in her mouth. The marshmallow centre, or heart as Lady J put it, was then reinserted back into the heat to smoke and cool and be eaten before the loosened and slippery confection met its fate with the burning coals below. Outstanding! Impressed with technique, Lady N, popped a marshmallow onto her stick and followed suit. Lady J broke into the new bag of marshmallows before the old ones ran out as they were too stale to easily pry off the golden-browned skin. The new marshmallows proved to work better, but were, in effect, too fresh to divide expertly as well. Lady J considered that the best kind of marshmallow to roast is one that is not too old, nor not too new; an opened-bag, resealed, left out for no more than a week, ideal.

For as much as others broadcast about Lady J’s lack of culinary credentials in the kitchen, Lady N was completely taken by her friend’s exactitude and marshmallow 101. Clearly, Lady J showed all the signs of a natural cook. Maybe the issue wasn’t with Lady J’s La Cornue, but really, la compagnie she keeps, or at least, invites over for a meal. Thankfully, at the boat-access-only cottage, Ladies were exclusively surrounded by family who were equally besotted as Lady N with Lady J’s perfect pillows of gelatin goodness. No business, bugs, or boys allowed. Perfect! Marshmallows or not, Ladies know how to live large with very little means! Everything else in life, is bonus!

IMAGE | Two Fat Als | detail, Marshmallows| 6 December 2007 | Canon EOS 20D

Comments

2 Responses to “The Best Things in Life are on a Stick”

  1. JM on February 26th, 2009 9:36 am

    You’ve described heaven! “Knowing better than to challenge a friend armed with a twig” - HA!
    Love the photo too - it’s inspiring fairy-tale images of princesses who are so sensitive they sleep on marshmallows.

  2. JM on February 26th, 2009 9:36 am

    NB - I am not the Lady J in the story!

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