Apr
24
With the bit of sun that comes with spring, so does many closeted (literally!) ensembles of what to wear during summer transition.
Acceptable looks, I know I’ll never pull off, are small-floral print dresses with tall Wellies and thick knee-highs; flats paired with skinny jeans and long layered tanks; bolero jackets over vintage concert Ts with shiny, skin-tight leggings. All items, that could very well do double duty come fall and even late winter, except for maybe one item.
Vests.
Vests might be the fashion culprit of transitional seasonal wear.
Not tight enough to be a corset, and not loose enough to be a jacket, a vest can make even the most stylish look like there’s something under wraps, (first date spaghetti stains, or a new bra that makes the girls look cone-shaped) and not in an extremely flattering way.
If your big, a vest makes you look bigger, and if your small, tiny.
A vest walks the fine line between cannelloni or sausage casing; much like the one (it did both!) that walked right passed me earlier today.
Leather on the back, fur on the front. Isn’t that two animals too many?
The vest was matched up with a leopard-print silk blouse, wool slacks (yes, slacks) and platform, sequin-studded flip-flops. I wish I had a camera, but I’m not that kind of girl.
I can’t get into the politics of wearing dead animal, or the cardinal sin committed by putting all these separate pieces (all various shades of brown, but with bare feet!) together. But in my books, if this is the fashion limb you choose to go out on, I hope it’s paired up with some oversized glasses, music recording contract and well-earned industry attitude, because drama (even the fashion kind) should only be left to the pros.
All hail the Queen of Hip-Hop Soul!
IMAGE | Fur jacket (with sleeves that zip off into no-nonsense vest!) from Fur Coats Canada.
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